My 2011 Resolution

December 31st is finally here.  Before declaring my resolution for 2011, it is important to first contemplate and re-cap 2010!

My new years resolution for 2010 was to get pregnant and have a baby and, indeed, that is what I did.  Pat on the ol’ back for me!  Since that first declaration at the stroke of midnight, the whole process went amazingly and almost too-good-to-be-true-smoothly.  I got pregnant in mid-February and every midwife appointment, every ultrasound, and every blood test had positive results.  I gained around 30 pounds and, as if this writing, have lost almost all of it.  Aside from some mild nausea in the beginning and some hip pain while I slept toward the end, I never experienced any discomfort.  I had a 40 hour labour, but aside from some icky meconium in the amniotic fluid that necessitated some uncomfortable fetal heart monitoring, the birthing experience went fantastically well (as fantastically well as pushing 7 pounds and 9 ounces of flesh and bones out of one’s body can be!).

And now I’ve got one of these!

You can’t buy this kind of cuteness

Motherhood is much more than I thought it would be.  If there is one word I had to use to describe it, I would say “relentless”.  There is no break.  It is a 24/7 job that is going to last me the rest of my life.  Even during one of the three times I have left him (for 1/2 hour at most), I constantly check my phone to see if there are any messages and I race back home as soon as I can.  He is my #1.  Every decision I make from hereon in will be informed by what is best for him, which leads me to my resolution for 2011…

To fail.

What a resolution, eh?  I wanted something bold and memorable and I think I have achieved it.

The main concern that occupies my mind these days is how I am going to balance a career/making money with motherhood once my leave is over in November 2011.  I have 11 months to go, but I am a planner and like to have a blueprint for what is to come.  Every day, I brainstorm ways to balance motherhood with financial well-being that doesn’t include winning the lottery (although that is my daily fantasy.  Cottage in the Muskokas y’say?!!?).  In an ideal world, I would be a stay-at-home-mom who bakes bread, hangs laundry in the sunshine, grows tomatoes in my garden, and guides Henry through all of life’s trials and tribulations.  (It sounds like I want to live on Little House on the Prairie, doesn’t it?). Really, I just want more time with my husband and baby boy.  I think that is what it boils down to.

I know being a stay-at-home-mom isn’t possible, so I am slowly constructing ideas of how I can be a part-time stay-at-home-mom while still making timely payments on my mortgage.  There is no perfect solution – at least not one I have thought of yet – which means that the odds of me experiencing failure while I search for a solution are great.  But I think I am ready to fail, or at least to experience failure with many contingency plans in place.  Being in the best financial situation I can be come November 2011 is paramount.  Frugality is going to reach all-time highs this year!  Just you wait and see…

So there it is. I want to fail.  More specifically, I want to shuck the familiar in an attempt to find a path that may be more challenging (and full of more failures) but will ultimately be a better choice for my family.

And I want to blog about it 🙂

May all of your resolutions, whatever they may be, come true in 2011.  As every motivational speaker in the history of the world has said — you can do anything you set your mind to.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!